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I didn’t realize it until today but I miss my best guy.

I haven’t seen him in quite a while so to talk to him today was such a relief. All I want to do is hug him tight and tell him he’s never allowed to leave me for longer than a month lol

chaaavan:

Being high is allowing me to remember losing my virginity. As in the aspects and details of that day that I couldn’t remember.

It’s amazing

chaaavan:

and in 4 months give or take a few (probably give) i’m moving.

i’m afraid of what’s to come. i’m afraid of the hardships i’ll be facing alone.

"you’re stronger than you think you are"

chaaavan:

and that’s why i want to fully do this on my own. 

i want to discover myself without the sway of someone else. i want to fix my own problems and control myself without someone else’s help or opinion. 

i don’t want to always be the best version of myself. i want to be messy and terrible. i don’t always want to take in to consideration or worry if everyone wants to go where i want to go. 

i’m tired of two-headed dragons and using the term “going out” as eating at some restaurant.

i want to dance and be crazy. i want to wander until i find the things that i didn’t know i was searching for.

i want to build my own foundation and be selfish with my time instead of just going along for a ride.

i was strong enough to get through so much on my own but i never really found the courage to do the things that scared me, but that made me happy, completely on my own.

it’s time for me to build my own empire and to be the leading lady of my own life.

chaaavan:

im gonna post this once and only once on here.

i am going to leave for japan in approximately 7 months and then for seattle in approximately 9 months.

besides this post right here, i have no intention of telling anyone except for a select few people such as coworkers (only because they HAVE to know for job reasons) and my HS bandit friend. 

so, peace out bitches.

i need to document thursday, september 11, 2014 as the day that i accidentally figured out how to shop at f21.

pulled a bunch of random clothes from the rack and threw together two amazing outfits in one try.

i honestly hate shopping there but today i realized that in order to shop there it requires no logical thinking. like don’t try to think “what goes well with this?” or “do i have something that matches?” 

just fricken grab shit that catches your eye and throw it all on together. BOOM! complete perfection.

I don’t think children, at any age, should ever learn the truth about their parents and the bad decisions they’ve made